California Heart

by Great Apes

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  • Digital Album
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  • Full Digital Discography Full Digital Discography

    Get all 10 Great Apes releases available on Bandcamp and save 25%.

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of The Mill - White Helmets Charity Digital Single, California Heart, Grey Tapes, Playland at the Beach, Live at Thee Parkside 1/4/2014, Thread, Split 7" with Know Your Saints, Split 7" with Daikon, and 2 more. , and , .

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  • 12" Full Length
    Record/Vinyl + Digital Album

    California Heart is the second full length and sixth release from San Francisco’s Great Apes. The record, akin to much of the band’s earlier material, is thematic. With California Heart, the concept is a fictional one, revolving around an alienated adolescent residing in Fresno, CA. Each song is written in first person and tackles a myriad of subjects including mental illness, suburban doldrums, creativity, nature as a sanctuary, social isolation, perceptions of adulthood, cliques, bullying, drugs, suicide, and an ever-crystallizing and often cynical view of the world. In its entirety, the record is intended to be a portrait of navigating coming of age as an outcast, in a stagnant and less-than-nurturing environment. Although the writing is founded in fiction, it’s undoubtedly inspired by personal experiences, and anyone who grew up feeling weird, anxious, down, and/or angst-ridden in a place they wanted out of should have no problem finding points of relation.

    The record was recorded over four days this past spring by Jack Shirley at The Atomic Garden.

    SIDE A
    1.California Heart
    2.The Last Days of Tranquility
    3.Saint Brasher
    4.Bullard Hex
    5.Brown Dots

    SIDE B
    6.Regarding the You in Me
    7.Chukchansis Complacency for Beginners
    8.Prom Com
    9.Shut in with the Burden
    10.The Escapist

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1.
paralyzed in the light of the living room on a cul de sac in Fresno - mid afternoon thoughts scratch until the synapse bleeds to the lullaby of the TV hum I concede all the catalog kids in the quad they scream, "this is the time of our lives." the teachers and shrinks they judge with scolding eyes - why can't I get it right? at the dinner table the parent strangers stare while I dream drift up through the warm autumn air past the fields and strip malls, tract homes and schools and then fall - a bug drowning on its back in some suburban pool the skate rats they ride through the sewer pipes – they’re down there getting high and the charlatan thugs gawk at the freshmen queens, who all date older guys maybe we're just a chemical mess brought here on a comet from the sky the failed experiment of an accident – maybe we’re just born to die tonight just let me sleep for the next two years I don’t want to think – I just want to disappear maybe we're just a chemical mess brought here on a comet from the sky the failed experiment of an accident – maybe we’re just born to die
2.
I’m cutting class today I can’t stand the insults or the masquerade 180 east up to the trees I’ve got my pen and my Parliaments anything to drown out the dissonance the hush of mountain air is what I need through the valley of pesticide and haze… where the palms choke and the cattle graze down there they’re all swarming but I’ll just keep ignoring the surge of selfishness and sin out there beyond the peaks it’s all so fucking bleak alone is the only place I fit in on the edge of Redwood Overlook I press my pleas into an empty book a hawk replies suspended over cliffs I write for the eyes of empathy for wild love and tranquility the wind pulls my words to the abyss beneath a blanket of branches and sky where the creeks speak and the ache it subsides down there they’re all swarming but I’ll just keep ignoring the surge of selfishness and sin out there beyond the peaks it’s all so fucking bleak alone is the only place I fit in when the sun sinks towards the sea it will drag me unwillingly back to the city of dust and drones where the crickets of Tulare Street lament in the summer heat I’ll be back before Dad gets home…
3.
I found a hidden shelter down in Room 23 lunch left of the dial with Ms. Kennedy stale coffee and old books a worn stack of LPs a poster of Saroyan Beat Happening Into the Wild, in her I confide through Big Sur, let the luminary guide she’s Antolini in a school of hacks and phonies when the Bell Tolls, I leave riding a Red Pony I found my voice with the unsung heroes I found my place with the Less Than Zeroes she could see the shine sinking in my eyes and she said, “The hurt will ebb and flow on manic tides.” Into the Unknown, let the Out of Step guide beneath the Crooked Rain, with her by my side in a Room Without a Window, she’s a set of stairs oh, she dared to dare, so I Will Dare she said, “be careful, boy. this town it’s so cruel. squeeze every drop of life – drink until you’re full.” she made us think - she let us bend the rules and they fired her right after school
4.
Bullard Hex 03:34
uninvited on Halloween to a party full of philistines I went as an invisible man I spied still in the shaking halls and walked through the sweating walls with a red plastic cup in my hand varsity vampires bared their teeth to the searing sounds of techno beats the dance floor was a horde of living dead in the backyard feral kittens squealed as a window left ajar revealed a nurse giving Teen Wolf head above the banter of the rabid dogs the bong smoke swirled into an eerie fog Jenny from art class smiled at me a gesture of pity and sympathy awkwardly I tried to wave but retreated to my shallow grave banished to the basement with the freaks medieval knights with twelve sided dice robotic nerds and punks with spikes upstairs the witches began to shriek around about twelve the cops hit the lights and the roaches scattered into the night I grabbed the nearest bottle and hopped the fence in the empty streets I bobbed and weaved through the candy wrappers and pumpkin seeds the ghost of childhood past in present tense I snuck in late through the sliding door and puked into my dresser drawer staring at a spinning ceiling / strangled by the sheets in a world of silent monsters, I lay there counting sheep
5.
I scored a hit right before first period off a sketchy metal head he pulled it from a black Jansport whited out with “Pantera shreds” we dropped it in the cab of his pickup - a rusted navy ’97 Chevy I was tripping; I was feelin’ fucked up he said, “dude, it’s gonna be heavy.” tunneling through the hallways with faces corroding all the colors of chemistry my whole world is exploding wasted we’re all so… when lunch hit I was swimming out in the grass on the field underneath the bleachers the buzz of the bees and the breeze in the trees tied to all time and creatures I peaked in math with my head buried in the desk tracing patterns on the back of my eyes when the teacher called me, I was transcendent high above my body disguise crashing down on the overpass in a cage above the freeway staring into the promise of insecurity and dismay wasted we're all so... wasted.
6.
turning the worn beige pages of the photo album I found in the basement with all the shit mom and dad don’t use they looked almost alive once camping out on the coast and laughing in the backyard with the friends they don’t see now I feel the imprint grip and rise the looks and the flaws devise a carbon copy in the veins to craft a curse of a life constrained I can’t become I can’t be the you in me the you in me I can’t succumb sever me from the tree the you in me the years flip to reveal swelling resentment concealed phantom shells of yourselves loveless and callous throughout a marriage of slamming doors of secrets and private wars a portrait of union aged the faith rots and the lustre fades I feel the imprint grip and rise the looks and the flaws devise a carbon copy in the veins to craft a curse of a life constrained I can’t become I can’t be the you in me the you in me I can’t succumb so sever me from the tree the you in me
7.
the ballpark has-beens watch the Grizzlies play idly cheering for false faith in some better days the game has been rigged it’s set for defeat they’ll bet on stacked odds cuz’ they’re so minor league you can try and you can dream but it won’t do anything… so keep calm and die there’s rot dogs and piss beer to lull out sure loss the painkillers of commerce or clutching a cross swing for the grandstands with no follow through in the nosebleeds of life settling is all they can do you can try and you can dream but it won’t do anything… so keep calm and die rise in revelry for mediocrity for blind complacency let’s rally for decay and when the eighth inning hits we better call it quits our team is always shit oh what’s the point anyway?
8.
Prom Com 01:55
look at the robots dating with their thumbs click to lick / swipe to cum edit yourself / no flaws seen desperate sales pitch / sex machine do you like me? look at the pretty ones wowing the crowd basking and beaming / shallow and proud hiding their secrets between white teeth makeup coverup / doubt beneath do you like me? all the crushing couples - hormones in the night enamored ‘neath the disco - bathing me in spite look at me - bitter out of place judging others while longing for embrace the last of the losers / loveless freak melancholy stoner nihilist geek do you like me? I hate me.
9.
the old familiar weight in the chest the knees creak and the bones compress locked myself in my room again buried in a coffin bed to mend with a mind set on self-mutiny there’s no pity or pill for remedy the moods swing like a pendulum a moment’s peak pulled back to plunge don’t lie and tell me I’ll be fine…. another sleepless night sun cuts through the curtain like a knife the clamor in the lobes never quits the valley fog in me never lifts don’t lie and tell me I’ll be fine…. (nothing you can say will make me feel good enough) these days are the pages I don’t want to read just turn me to the good parts that will never be a cruel author’s character - penned for tragedy just turn me to the good parts that will never be on day three I was forced from quarantine by a friend’s attempt to kindle self-esteem coffee and smokes at River Park with her hand on mine she begged: “don’t you fall apart” just lie and tell me I’ll be fine (maybe something you could say will make me feel good enough) these days are the pages I don’t want to read just turn me to the good parts that will never be a cruel author’s character - penned for tragedy just turn me to the good parts that will never be
10.
The Escapist 02:17
it’s funny to feel so trapped when you’re staring out at the expanse of possibility the dust of fear and routine expectations and cell screens horizons fall to futility when I’m gone you’ll forget me frankly that’s alright you’ll be sleepwalking here in the cogs and the gears while I’m exploding in the light it’s strange to feel so spent in the age of innocence hope chokes and the serotonin slides staring out into the night through the farms to coastal flight where fantasy and savage truth collide when I’m gone you’ll forget me frankly that’s alright you’ll be sleepwalking here in the cogs and the gears while I’m exploding in the light if there’s a god she’s laughing at this toxic petri dish oh, I need a sign that it’s not all meaningless after sixteen years of lies, in a humming car I drive to the churning west and walk into the sea when I’m gone you’ll forget me frankly that’s alright you’ll be sleepwalking here in the cogs and the gears while I’m exploding in the light.

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Great Apes: Brian Moss, Matthew Kadi, Ryan Marshall, Chris Chapel


Recorded over the course of four days in March 2016 at The Atomic Garden in East Palo Alto.
Jack Shirley engineered, mixed and mastered the record. Additional backup vocals by Shaye Farwell.
All songs written by Great Apes. Layout and photography by Matthew Kadi.

Thank You: Friends and Family, Daikon, All Eyes West, The New Trust, The Lawrence Arms, Western Settings, Gentlemen Prefer Blood, Turkish Techno, Caskitt, Bastards of Young, Slow Code, Rob Carter, Mike Park, Adam Gecking, Leslie Hampton, Marty Ploy, Ziggy Pelayo, Bottom of the Hill, Thee Parkside, Homestead, Jack Shirley, Shaye Farwell, Johah Strauss, Ian and the DeCaro family, Jennifer Sulyman, Darren, Liz, Mike and Suzanne Chapel, Richelle Cullen, The Kadi and Edwars Family, Luke Andrews, The Crust Bucket, Sleeping Ghost Prints.

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released October 14, 2016

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Great Apes San Francisco, California

Insert hype-up descriptors here. Plain and simple, San Francisco's Great Apes are a lyrical punk band. Music, much like a bio, is often at its best when it’s spit out intensely and quickly, with concision and honesty.

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